The Faithful Father

Fatherlessness is a national epidemic.  If it were diagnosed as an illness, it would be worthy to be called “a national emergency”.  Fatherlessness is associated with almost every societal ill facing our country’s children today.  Of homes that do have fathers, many of them can be disconnected and emotionally unavailable or abusive, which leads to even more issues besides those from them being absent.  There is a war going on at the family level, and the affects are devastating!

• 1 out of 3 homes have no biological father in them.
• 1 out of 4 homes have no father figure of any kind in them.
• 2 out of 3 black children grow up in fatherless homes.
• In total, 43% of all children live without their father.
• 1 out of 3 black children will spend time in jail who are in fatherless homes.
• 63% of youth suicides come from fatherless homes.
• 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.
• 75% of teen chemical abuse patients come from fatherless homes.
• 80% of rapists with anger problems come from fatherless homes.
• 82% of one parent homes are mothers only.
• 85% of all children with behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes.
• 85% of all youths in prison come from fatherless homes.
• 90% of all runaway children and the homeless come from fatherless homes.
• 90% of repeat arsonists come from fatherless homes.
• 92% of parents in prison are fathers.
• 200% more likely to be obese.
• 400% a greater risk of poverty.
• 400% increase in infant mortality rate in first month of life.
• 700% more likely to become pregnant as a teen.

• Overall, kids are more emotionally and socially well balanced with a father.
• Perform much better academically in school, they’re more likely to get A’s.
• Much more likely to enjoy school and participate in extracurricular activities.
• They are much less likely to be mistreated/abused.
• They are much less likely to suffer from depression.
• They are much less likely to become absent fathers themselves one day.
• Overall, it leads to less stress in the home for mom and the children.
• It provides greater income stability and more leisure time.
• It promotes closeness and healthier overall life choices.

 

Regardless of what your faith is, whatever your background and current situation might be, the facts are overwhelming. They can’t be ignored and dismissed as coincidence or trivial.  It is a universal truth that a healthy home life with two parents actively involved in instilling virtue and value in their children’s lives has an enormous impact first and foremost on the individual level, then on a family level, and then on society as a whole!  Otherwise known as the “ripple” effect.

It might seem like common sense and something that doesn’t need to be explained or discussed in any detail, but the direction in which we are headed seems to be contrary to that notion.  The fundamental family unit is broken and seems to be a relic of the past.  It is considered no longer the norm, but perhaps at times now the exception to the “new normal”.  Single parent homes, blended families, same-sex parents, cross-gendered parents, divorce on demand, etc. While Mothers are celebrated one day a year and Fathers get one day a year, LGBTQIA+ gets a whole month devoted to being proud of something they are “supposedly” born with?  If you had no choice and were born that way, then why be proud of something you nothing to do with and no control over? Anyway, the acronym only seems to be getting longer and more confusing…Lesbian, gay, bi-sexual, transgender, queer and questioning, intersex, asexual and plus meaning whatever else you can come up with! 

So, think of the LGBTQIA+ movement as pretty much anything apart from the standard model - a biological woman who is a mother, and a biological man who is a father, who are married and in the same house and generally can have kids together without the aid of doctors and donors. Which, by the way, is the most stable environment a child can be raised in, assuming the parents are not crazy or abusive and actually want to nurture and help the child grow up to be a responsible adult!  Any woman who wants to simply be a mom and raise her kids is frowned upon and seen as a remnant of an oppressive and archaic society.  She must have a career and any kids take a backseat to that.  Any man who wants a traditional woman is looked at as a tyrant and an oppressive ogre who is toxic to the radical feminist movement which tries to obliterate any gender specific roles.

It's even gone so far as to say Mom and Dad are not gender specific, but simply duties done that are generally associated with that title.  If you bake cookies with your kids, you are a mom (even if you are a guy), and if you take them to a ball game or play catch with them, you are a dad.  And of course, at the same time if you say only moms bake then you are bigoted and oppressive!  A rather peculiar time to be alive!  I thank God for my parents, who spent the time to nurture, teach, and allow me to grow up to be the independent person that I am today.  What a blessing it is to have had someone like them in my life then and even now still today!  I love you guys!!  You have had more of an impact than you will ever know…

 

This brings us to one of the most familiar stories in all of Scripture: The Prodigal Son, or more properly titled, “The Faithful Father with 2 prodigal sons”!  You will find it in Luke chapter 15 in verses 11-32. Luke chapter 15 contains 3 different parables, and all of them are a result of verses 1 and 2:

 

Luke 15:1  Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him.

Luke 15:2 And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, “This man receives sinners and eats with them.”

 

Jesus then goes on to tell his audience, the sinners and the self-righteous, 3 different parables.  The first is about a lost sheep and the rejoicing in heaven over just one sheep who is found that repents, as opposed to 99 sheep who are self-righteous and don’t think they need to repent.  The lost coin represents the exact same theme in that there is rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents, as opposed to those who don’t think they need to.  While the prodigal son is a much longer story, it has the same theme as well.  There are 2 prodigal sons, one who is a sinner who repents, and one who is self-righteous who doesn’t repent. The joy is for the one who was lost and repents and is now found and is contrary to the one who does not feel a need to repent, doesn’t think he is lost, and is sadly never found.  It describes his audience perfectly.  And Jesus told this story in an almost outrageous and offensive manner to His listeners.

 

Luke 15:11 And he said, “There was a man who had two sons.

 

The story starts off on a high note, as Jewish sons were a blessing to any father. It meant someone who would carry on the name and traditions of the family line.  Sons were also an important part of the agricultural and fishing industries which dominated that time period and were necessary for their survival.  The more sons you had, the more to carry on your name, and all the more to make your industry more successful. The first-born son would receive the blessing and a double portion of the inheritance that would be divided amongst all the sons.  It would typically be on his deathbed that the father would give the blessing and the inheritance to the sons.  Isaac and his two sons would be a story His audience would be well acquainted with. A father on his death bed being tricked by his younger son to give him the blessing and the double portion (as Isaac was blind and near death), while the older son wept over not getting his birthright which he sold for a bowl of stew!  Scandalous and offensive to Jewish customs and traditions.

 

Luke 15:12 And the younger of them said to his father, ‘Father, give me the share of property that is coming to me.’ And he divided his property between them.

 

This was absolutely outrageous!  First of all, the younger son was in no place to ask for anything before the older son, and especially while the father was still in good health!  It was as if he was saying to the father, “I have no use for your beliefs or lifestyle, I don’t appreciate anything you have done for me, I don’t want to live with you, all I care about is the wealth I can get from you, and I basically wish you were dead!”  The way the Jewish men valued their sons, their lineage going back to Abraham, along with their customs and traditions, I can’t think of a more offensive statement at that time.  This would be “the ultimate sin” in their eyes, which is exactly the picture Jesus is trying to paint for them!  Remember that Jesus is also surrounded by tax collectors and sinners, what the Pharisees and Scribes would think of as the filth of society.  Jesus is describing a father who has the worst son imagineable, even worse than what they thought of the tax collectors and sinners surrounding Jesus.  In fact, I can imagine that when Jesus told this part of the parable that the Pharisees were looking around at the tax collectors and sinners and trying to imagine which one of them would do just as the younger son in the story was doing!  It's not something they would ever do, or even think of doing, as the righteous leaders of all of Israel, but they wouldn’t put it past those “sinners” standing near to them.

 

Luke 15:13 Not many days later, the younger son gathered all he had and took a journey into a far country, and there he squandered his property in reckless living.

 

AHA!  Just as would be expected!  That good for nothing, vile, offensive, sinful younger son not only threw away the family name, and the family occupation, but also the family inheritance on selfish destructive living.  Inheritances were to be cherished, and used wisely to honor the father’s legacy, not for wild parties and selfish indulgence!  What a shameful description.  This would be the kind of son that a father would tear his shirt over and cover his head with ash to mourn his death, even though he was still alive.  There would be no forgiveness or coming back from this, as far as the father would be concerned this was the end of the matter, his son was dead.

 

Luke 15:14 And when he had spent everything, a severe famine arose in that country, and he began to be in need.

 

Famine was something Israel was all too familiar with.  Often it was a result of disobedience and judgment from God and is littered throughout their long disobedient past.  Around a 2,000-year cycle of:

• sin or falling away from God, which led to -
• judgment or punishment, which led to -
• suffering and often enslavement, which led to -
• repentance and a cry for help, which led to -  
• redemption, and a period of obedience and restoration,
• and often soon after that the cycle started all over again. 

The judgment and suffering portion included famine a great deal of the time.  It wouldn’t be a great stretch to assume that everyone listening thought the famine in the land was a direct result of the actions of that horrible son.  He would be the one to blame for the suffering of all those around him.  Not only did he permanently harm his father and family name, but an entire region was now to suffer because of his sinful lifestyle and rebellion!  The son deserved to suffer and die, but not others around him!  That is just so horribly unfair and all the more reason why the son should be put to death!

 

Luke 15:15 So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed pigs.

 

There is probably no animal as disgusting to Jewish people as the pig. It’s not just because it may not be eaten.  There are plenty of other animals that aren’t kosher either, but none of them arouse as much disgust as the pig. Colloquially, the pig is the ultimate symbol of loathing; when you say that someone “acted like a pig,” it suggests that he or she did something unusually offensive. Indeed, many Jews think of pork, ham, bacon, etc., as the most unkosher foods there are.  Pigs are also noted for carrying diseases and are associated with filth, so Jews were not allowed to even raise pigs, let alone eat them.  Pigs also ate unclean things which made them even more detestable.  Obviously this citizen was not a jew as he had pigs on his farm, so this detestable son is now working for a gentile feeding the most detestable animal to the Jews.  Greeeeeeeat…this story is just getting worse and worse as it goes on!

 

Luke 15:16 And he was longing to be fed with the pods that the pigs ate, and no one gave him anything.

 

Whaaaat!  The son wanted to eat the pig food??  The pigs were eating carob pods - If you’re a chocoholic, then you may be into carob — which is a finely ground powder that comes from carob pods grown on trees primarily found in the Mediterranean.  This sweet and nutty treat not only tastes like chocolate, but also has some impressive health benefits including its antioxidant potential and grams of fiber per serving.  The carob pods, however, are virtually indigestible to humans and of no use to us to eat.  Nevertheless, this detestable son wanted to eat right alongside the filthy unclean pigs, as if he were one!  It’s bad enough he was working on a gentile farm and not his father’s farm, but also feeding the most detestable animal there is, and then being jealous of what that disgusting animal is eating?  And then to complain that no one gave him anything, as if somehow, he deserved to be given anything?  Jesus’ audience knew exactly what he deserved…death!

 

Luke 15:17 “But when he came to himself, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired servants have more than enough bread, but I perish here with hunger!

 

Fine time for him to come to his senses…his father’s servants deserved to be fed and treated as they were because they were faithful to his father.  They got what they deserved because they earned it.  This faithless sinful son deserved to perish with hunger as he left everyone in his wake of selfish desires destitute.  He caused a deadly and destructive famine and unimaginable grief to his family.  He destroyed his father’s and family name, made a mockery of his inheritance, and destroyed his own reputation with sinful fleshly desires being fulfilled. It’s too late…just do the honorable thing and perish, it’s what you deserve thought the Pharisees and Scribes.

 

Luke 15:18 I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you.

 

I can picture the eyes of the Pharisees and Scribes at this point…they probably couldn’t open any bigger or have any more contempt for this son than they already do, but this would be the last straw!  To have the audacity to actually go back to his father and beg?  This was not something that could be forgiven, especially knowing what happened after the son left his father’s presence.  The father could only have known any of that if it had gotten back to him by word of mouth, yet even so, what the son did in the father’s house before he left was unforgiveable.  He is now considered dead, less than a servant and no longer a son, and of no use to the father or the family.

 

Luke 15:19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Treat me as one of your hired servants.”’

That’s right you’re no longer worthy to be called a son!  And there’s no way you are ever going to be treated or hired as a servant!  Someone who is unfaithful and stabbed the family in the back will never be given an opportunity to do the same thing again.  What would everyone think if a disrespectful son was to come back and be hired as a servant?  Think of the scandal!  Better to disown and disavow then to give in with any measure of leniency or forgiveness.  The father would be looked at as weak, and the family name would be even more of a joke than it was because of the son’s actions and the father’s spineless reaction.  This son must have brain damage because his thinking is anything but normal or honoring.

 

Luke 15:20 And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.

 

Not in a million years!  After everything this son has done, no father would ever do what this story just described…perhaps the father would let the son come all the way to him, groveling on his hands and knees, broken and humble now, admitting his faults and his horrible deeds, and allowing for the father to have some measure of revenge in turning his back on him to keep his honor and dignity. 

The description of what happened is actually quite shocking…the father is looking and longing for this son to return.  He is anticipating and hoping the son will return – as opposed to going through a period of mourning and moving on as though he were dead.  He spots him a long way off in the distance (like he has a pair of binoculars or something and is just staring off into the distance) and doesn’t just go stand outside and wait for him to approach, he doesn’t walk out and meet him halfway, but instead runs to him (how undignified for a 1^st century Jewish father!!). And when he gets to the son, he doesn’t smack him on the back of his head or reprimand him in any way but hugs and kisses him instead!  He felt compassion, even after everything that has happened, and compassion would be the last emotion they would think would come to mind.  Why would this father feel sorry for what this son has brought on himself?

 

Luke 15:21 And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’

 

This is one part that everyone can agree on.  He certainly has sinned against heaven and before the father, but it is not his place to determine whether he gets to be called a son or not. It is not something you earn, but something you are born into.  He certainly didn’t act as one who would be worthy of the family name, and didn’t honor his father and mother, the only commandment attached with a promise, and also the first commandment regarding our relationship with other people.  This is also only part of the son’s rehearsed speech, as he doesn’t get to say “treat me as one of your hired servants” before he gets cut off by the father.

I can imagine the anticipation of what the audience expects the father to say in return to the son’s statement of repentance and humility. No one was expecting the father to run out and hug and kiss him, that’s for sure…and no one is expecting what is to come next as the father cuts off the sons confession:

 

Luke 15:22 But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet.

The best robe, a ring, and sandals?  Are you kidding me??  The robe, ring & sandals help show the father’s high level of love, honor and authority for the son. The robe and the ring are symbolic of how well the father will be treating his son (like how Jacob and Pharaoh treated the favorite son Joseph). Jacob honored Joseph by getting him a long colorful tunic, and the jealous brothers saw how Jacob was the favorite son. (Gen 37:3-4)

They hated him so much they sold him into Egypt as a slave. When in Egypt, Joseph heard of Pharaoh’s dreams and interpreted them for him, saying there would be seven years of abundance followed by seven years of famine. With that Pharaoh put Joseph in charge of Egypt, and while doing so, Pharaoh placed his own ring on Joseph’s finger. He then had him dressed in robes of fine linen. (Gen 41:41-43)

In the ancient world a ring was not simply a matter of vanity. It was no mere item of excess wealth – or as young people might call it, “bling bling”. A ring carried great significance just as an engagement or wedding ring does in our world today.

“What does the giving of a ring mean? It is the granting of authority to a person. Whoever has such a ring has the power of attorney for his master. He has authority, to make decisions and to help the master govern his realm. And when the father places the ring on the hand of his son, he not only welcomes him back home as a son, as was indicated by the robe, but he welcomes him back to responsibility and authority.”  A signet ring is a centuries-old tradition and is seen as a symbol of status and family lineage. The ring typically bears the family's crest or coat of arms, which is used to authenticate documents or seals.

The sandals signified he was NOT a servant but the son of the father. Servants wore no sandals, so when the father refused to let his son be a mere servant (even before the son could share that part of his speech), this is symbolic of the compassion and love of the father.

This son had done NOTHING to deserve to be treated this way.  He showed a lack of honor, poor character, bad judgment, and only self-absorbed tendencies.  This was not someone to be trusted, let alone given authority and sonship back to so easily.  Perhaps after a great deal of time as a slave, could he earn his way back, and even then, it would be highly unlikely to ever be restored as a son and an heir.  This is something no one saw coming and could even be considered offensive and outrageous considering their traditions and beliefs.

 

Luke 15:23 And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate.

Luke 15:24 For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.’ And they began to celebrate.

 

This just keeps getting more and more unbelievable…now there is going to be a party with the son who blew everything on parties and prostitutes?  And this is not just any party, but a celebration with the best that this house has to offer, a party of great honor and significance.  A party that would be reserved for only the most special occasions, such as a wedding.  The party this son deserved was a funeral, and that would be his funeral.  If not his actual death, then a symbolic death instead at the very least.   

 

Luke 15:25 “Now his older son was in the field, and as he came and drew near to the house, he heard music and dancing.

 

Diligently working away like a good righteous little Pharisee or Scribe.  Doing what a good son ought to be doing and coming upon the house he became intrigued as to what was going on because he wasn’t invited and had no knowledge of any party at his own house.

 

Luke 15:26 And he called one of the servants and asked what these things meant.

 

It seems kind of odd that he beckons a servant to find out what is going on instead of just going in and seeing for himself, but also ironic that the servants know what is going on in his own house and he doesn’t.

 

Luke 15:27 And he said to him, ‘Your brother has come, and your father has killed the fattened calf, because he has received him back safe and sound.’

 

Even though this was a parable, this was the first double take in history!  Say what now?  Not only is my back-stabbing brother back, but there is a party going on with the best this house has to offer, and I wasn’t even informed or invited?  Let me make sure I heard you right and didn’t misinterpret what you just said…repeat that and say it much slower and plainer so I don’t miss a thing!  Because, there is no way you just meant exactly what you said as that will NEVER happen, not in my house or with my father.  So, imagine the servant repeated it much slooooower this time until what he said sunk in and the older brother began to stew over it…

 

Luke 15:28 But he was angry and refused to go in. His father came out and entreated him,

 

Nothing works better at resolving any issue than acting like a two-year-old and pouting!  Communication is way to overrated and highly ineffective…just sulking and acting immature works every time!  I’ll show them, I’ll just sit out here and make myself miserable and then we’ll see who has the last laugh…oh wait, maybe that doesn’t work so well after all! Nevertheless, he tries his best to pout, and the father makes his way out to the older son.  The Pharisees had to be like, “I can’t wait to see how he treats the older son who actually was obedient and faithful to the old man, he deserves like a medal and double everything this loser got!”  And so, the older son, out of his angry pouty face (you need to picture that in your mind, as I’m sure you and I have never acted that way, but we can imagine others we have seen make that face), so picture now that face as he makes his plea to the father:

 

Luke 15:29 but he answered his father, ‘Look, these many years I have served you, and I never disobeyed your command, yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might celebrate with my friends.

Luke 15:30 But when this son of yours came, who has devoured your property with prostitutes, you killed the fattened calf for him!’

 

First, he points to his righteous actions, then to the fact that he has NEVER once been disobedient and would be satisfied as a reward for all his loyalty and obedience with at least a young goat.  It doesn’t have to be the fatted calf, but just as long as he gets rewarded and can have a party with his friends.  He then goes on to list the atrocities of his younger brother (isn’t it just like a goody-two-shoes to make a list of everyone else’s faults) and how he (the younger brother) deserved nothing but instead got more than he (the older brother) ever got for all he had done for the father.  Where’s the justice?  Where’s the reward for all the “good” I have done?  How is this fair?  I’m justified for my anger and jealousy against you and my brother. 

 

Luke 15:31 And he said to him, ‘Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours.

 

It’s interesting that being with the father, being a son, enjoying everything that the father has, and working alongside the father, that it is not enough for the older brother.  The green-eyed jealousy monster had set in.  It revealed the heart of the older brother, who for all appearances “looked” righteous, but inwardly was a prodigal himself.  His heart harbored along with that jealousy - anger, pride and unforgiveness.  That also describes someone Jesus will say “I never knew you” to, while they claim all the righteous things they did for Him.

 

Luke 15:32 It was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your brother was dead, and is alive; he was lost, and is found.’”

 

There is more joy in heaven over 1 sinner who repents than over any amount who claim to be self-righteous.  Both of the brothers are prodigal in some sense, one inwardly and one outwardly.  The outwardly one repents and is restored as a son, full of the promises and inheritances of heaven and is representative of the tax collectors and sinners who came to Jesus who had a repentant heart.  The inwardly one does not repent and shows the hardness of their heart and represents the Pharisees and the Scribes who rely on their good works in order to get a reward that they will sadly never see.  The parable is left with a cliff-hanger in that in never reveals what happens to the older son, but with the audience in mind it is pretty obvious what the outcome is.

Ultimately the story is about the faithful, loving, and forgiving father.  Both sons sinned against the father.  Both were prodigal in some sense.  Neither one deserved nor earned the right to be called a son.  In the end it was a repentant, humble heart that revealed who the only true son of the father was.  And what a picture we see of the love of the Father towards that son.  The love of the father was also available to the other son, who sadly rejected it.

Being an earthly father has many similarities to this parable.  Our kids don’t have to earn the right to be a part of our families.  They shouldn’t have to think of ways they can get your love and attention.  Love should be offered whether they want to accept it or not.  Forgiveness given regardless of the significance of the offense.  Compassion shown as they stumble and grow.  Our heavenly Father is the perfect model of what it means to be an earthly father, and while we can never live up to that expectation, blessings will come from following that pattern – and as a word of caution, deviation from that will also bring about cursing, confusion and chaos.

Celebrate the good you have or remember in your earthly father today and remember the greatness that is in your heavenly father!

 

Let’s pray…